YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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