Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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