can we get nightvision for the apartment?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
