dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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