is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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