Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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