he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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