Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
