My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize