just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special