Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
we're making bets on your personal life
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
