i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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