yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
