Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
