Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Randomize
