P.S. I can't hear my feet
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize