so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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