? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I have post one night stand depression
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