My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Someone shattered a urinal.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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