i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
