Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
