spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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