why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
So squirting runs in the family.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
The struggles of a small town man whore
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.