i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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