oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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