Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
