are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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