; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
