can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
