she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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