dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
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