so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
