Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
