She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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