Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
