i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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