sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I will die if light touches me.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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