I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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