It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize