I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize