You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
