I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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