is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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