if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
