at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize
