the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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