im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
