Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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