..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
