hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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