bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
